The Jokes/Riddles thread

[DavidBryson]

searched and found nothing
post and respond to any jokes and riddles in this thread
ill start
What is greater than god, more evil than the devil
The poor have it, the rich need it
If you eat it, you will die.

 

[Anthσny]

Nothing.

 

[Cookie]

me.

 

[Colab]

ok so there were these two guys named Shut Up and Trouble.
One day, Shut Up and Trouble went into a forest. Trouble got lost. Shut Up then went to the police station and told the police that he had lost his friend. The policeman said "What's your name?" Shut Up then replied "Shut Up". The policeman said "Sir, I'm going to ask you again. What is your name?" Shut Up replied "Shut Up". The policeman then said "Sir, I'm losing my patience. What is your name?" Shut Up then shouted "SHUT UP!" Then the policeman said "Are you looking for trouble?" Shut Up replied "Actually, yes I am!"

 

[Cookie]

Knock, Knock



Whos there?



It's the police, your Mother has been killed in a car accident

 

[DavidBryson]

A naked woman gets into a cab. The driver turned and was staring at her for ages. She then said "what? Never seen a naked woman before" then the driver said "no, I was just wondering where you keep my money"

 

[Bear Grylls]

Womens rights

 

[Cookie]

A man walks into a bar




He has a wife, four kids and a serious drinking problem

 

[Nick Griffin <3]

i love you^

 

[Cookie]

Yo momma's so fat



She has increased risk of cardiovascular disease

 

[Ryno496]

your mom is so fat that she has more chins than a chinese phonebook

 

[Buttered Bread]

how do you make a plumber cry? kill his family.

 

[Cookie]

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?



Cancer

 

[DavidBryson]

In melbourne, someone stole all the public toilets. The police never knew who it was, because they had nothing to go on

 

[Carson .]

Why does beyonce sing to the left?


Cuz women have no rights.

 

[michaelchavez]

your momma's so stupid she has an i.q. of 65

 

[DavidBryson]

yo momma so fat that when she turns around she gets given a welcome back party

 

[Ryno496]

anti jokes arent funny over the web... dnt post them haha its all about facial expression and atitude

 

[SammyT]

Why does beyonce sing to the left?


Cuz women have no rights.

this... is fucking funny

 

[Rob.]

There's an anti jokes thread in gentlemens discussion guys lol.