fmylife.com

D

dre

Member
http://www.fmylife.com/


Basically people post shitty/hilarious things that happen to them on there, and some of them are fucking hilarious.

For example:
"Today, I had to get my license renewal picture taken and after the first go the woman said "It looks like your eyes are closed." I'm Asian. FML"
 
B

Brian Boston

I got myself banned.
Some of these are so fuckking funny

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

Today, when my boyfriend and I were lying in bed, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML

Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML


Today, I took my friend to buy a pregancy test. She took it and it came out negative. I decided to re-pee on it to be funny...it turned to positive. FM

fuck i cant stop reading these...
 
Hep Greg

Hep Greg

Administrator
"Today, I told my mom I was going through a growth spurt. She said "Yeah, horizontally." FML

LMAO
 
D

dre

Member
"Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML"
 
R

Red Redemption7

Member
"Today, I sent my best friend Mike the link to a porn site we were talking about at a party. Turns out the name ââ?¬Å?Momââ?¬Â is right next to ââ?¬Å?Mikeââ?¬Â in my contacts list. FML"

"Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidently sent it to my dad and got a text back saying "You definitely take after your mom". FML"

"Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML"

lol these are funny
 
B

briflip

Member
Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. When she asked me to pick up her thong from behind my bed I realized there were two. I didn't pick up hers. FML
 
Y

yamamsmells

Member
Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "your looking very white today!" He's African American. FML
Today, I finally reunited with a lot of old friends from school. It was great to see everyone grown up and hear the stories. At the end we decided to have a group photo for old times sake. They asked me to take the picture. FML

some of these are so funny haha.
 
Stevenson

Stevenson

Steel Member
Today I returned home from college for the first time in a month. I went to my bedroom and found a nice gift bag on my dresser, thinking it was a Valentine's gift , I opened it. My dog's ashes were in a tin inside. This is how I found out my dog has died since I have been away. FML

Today, I finally got the chance to hook up with the girl I really like. She was naked, and as she was taking my pants off, she looked at my penis and said, "oh, I just remembered I have to babysit my little sister today." FML

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad proceeded to warn me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said "sorry I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML
I love this site hahahaha
 
humpurple kushiones

humpurple kushiones

Steel Member
Dre said:
"Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML"
Click to expand...
hahahahahha best one

another good one
Today, my mom took me to the doctor for my annual physical. Puberty still hasn't arrived, and the doctor seems concerned. Then he leaves the room, and leaves the door ajar. I overhear him discussing my undeveloped penis with my mom, and brings her in to show her 'the problem'. FML
 
N

Nate Grant

Steel Member
Stevenson-Scoot said:
Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said "sorry I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML
I love this site hahahaha
Click to expand...

that has definately happened to me before lol
 
J

Josh N.

Josh N
Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reactionââ?¬Â¦ ââ?¬Å?I love Los Angeles too!ââ?¬Â FML

haha so great
 
C

CodyChirichiello

Steel Member
Best one I have read yet:

Today, me and my girlfriend were watching some show about sex on the discovery channel. The topic of female orgasms came up and she said, "Wow, I wonder what that's like?" We've been dating and sexually active for three years. FML
 
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