your funniest jokes

A

Anthony Bustos

Member
best joke ever right here ready....
why did the chicken cross the road???...

to get to the other side!!!=)
lol that was an original knee slapper right there
i know your welcome to all of you who had a good laugh from that
 
K

Kenny O.

Member
I dunno who, but the 3 or 4 people who freaked out over the racist jokes need to pull your head outta your ass and get over it. ITS A JOKE, it doesn't mean he's racist.

I just heard this joke like last week, its not tTHAT funny but I like it
Whats the difference between porcupines and pourches (the car) ?
The pricks are on the outside of a porcupine
 
K

Kenny O.

Member
double post because i can

LOL just saw this one
Why Men Have Better Friends

Women's Friends:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The husband called his wife's ten best friends. None of them had seen her or knew what he was talking about.

Men's Friends:

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.
 
Y

young08

I'M A G.
Kenny Owens said:
I dunno who, but the 3 or 4 people who freaked out over the racist jokes need to pull your head outta your ass and get over it. ITS A JOKE, it doesn't mean he's racist.

I just heard this joke like last week, its not tTHAT funny but I like it
Whats the difference between porcupines and pourches (the car) ?
The pricks are on the outside of a porcupine
Click to expand...

You obviously do know who lol just read the names that the posts came from.

And i'm not saying hes a racist, i just don't think racist jokes should be allowed.
 
G

GeoffGeoff

Member
Hahaa round two! Whats the difference between a dead dog in the street and a dead black guy in the street? Theres skid marks in front of the dog!

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing mittens!

What do you call a black guy with a harvard education? N****r!

What do you call 50 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A good start!

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? It sounds like run nigga nigga nigga run nigga nigga!

Why did a black woman get $500 from Crimestoppers? She had an abortion!

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

What do you call a Mexican with a fake toe? Roberto!

What do you do if theres a one legged Mexican hopping around on your yard? Stop laughing and reload!

Why arent there any mexicans on Star Trek? They dont work now and they wont work in the future!

What do you get when you cross a mexican and a black? Someone too lazy to steal!

How do you get a black guy into a car? Throw in a welfare check!

How do you get the black guy out of a car? Throw in a job application!

How do you get black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope!

What do you say if your TV starts floating at night? Drop it n****r!

How does Santa know he's at a Jewish house? There's a parking meter on the roof.

Did you hear about the new car from Israel? Not only can it stop on a dime, it can go back and pick it up!

How was copper wire invented? Two Jews fighting over a penny!

Why should you never ask a Jew his opinion? He'll give you his two cents and ask for it back!

What does Pontiac stand for? Poor Old N****r Thinks It's A Cadillac.
 
N

nick12667

Member
ok. i think on some of those you went a little too far man. haha, your gonna get shot for some of those haha jk no seriously...

just a chill with some of those. they were funny but yeah you did take em a little too far
 
G

guslarsen

Bronze member
Nick Granger said:
ok. i think on some of those you went a little too far man. haha, your gonna get shot for some of those haha jk no seriously...

just a chill with some of those. they were funny but yeah you did take em a little too far
Click to expand...
i agree with nick...

heres a lame one..
you: what were you eating under there?
some other guy: underwear
so so so stupid hey? i got it of someone that i don't even know
its funny when they rielize what they said...
 
K

Kenny O.

Member
GeoffGeoff said:
Hahaa round two! Whats the difference between a dead dog in the street and a dead black guy in the street? Theres skid marks in front of the dog!

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing mittens!

What do you call a black guy with a harvard education? N****r!

What do you call 50 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A good start!
Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? It sounds like run nigga nigga nigga run nigga nigga!
Why did a black woman get $500 from Crimestoppers? She had an abortion!

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

What do you call a Mexican with a fake toe? Roberto!

What do you do if theres a one legged Mexican hopping around on your yard? Stop laughing and reload!
Why arent there any mexicans on Star Trek? They dont work now and they wont work in the future!

What do you get when you cross a mexican and a black? Someone too lazy to steal!

How do you get a black guy into a car? Throw in a welfare check!

How do you get the black guy out of a car? Throw in a job application!

How do you get black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope!
What do you say if your TV starts floating at night? Drop it n****r!

How does Santa know he's at a Jewish house? There's a parking meter on the roof.
Did you hear about the new car from Israel? Not only can it stop on a dime, it can go back and pick it up!

How was copper wire invented? Two Jews fighting over a penny!

Why should you never ask a Jew his opinion? He'll give you his two cents and ask for it back!

What does Pontiac stand for? Poor Old N****r Thinks It's A Cadillac.
Click to expand...
HAHAHAHHAHAHHA
omg
i love those
 
N

Nate Grant

Steel Member
k so me, my friend tabor, john radtke, dustin nooner, hector, tanner, kenny, twan, and taylor are all at taylors. Tabor, John, Dustin and me are all sitting in the backyard on lawnchairs. from around the corner we hear, "Twan! that is not straight, do you want our fucking help our not?!?!?" then twan yells, "thats as straight as i'll ever get it! using your hands won't make it any straighter" and the four of us just start cracking up, then a very pissed off looking twan walks around the corner trying wrestling with his buff bars. he glares at us and is all, "whats so funny" lol it was so funny i guess you had to be there
 
S

sherjey

Member
yo mama is so fat that when she fell in love she got stuck
yo mama is so ugly that when she looked out the window she got areester for mooning
yo mama is so poor that when i was riding a skate board she said get off the family car!
yo mama is so poor that when i stepped on a cigirette she asked who turned out the heat?
yo mama is so poor that when she was kicking a can down the street i asked her what she was doing she said moving to a difirent dumster
yo mama is so stupid that she returned a puzle cuz she thought it was broken
yo mama is so stupid she sat on the TV and wached the couch
yo mama is so stupid she got hit my a parked car
yo mama is so fat that she sat on the rainbow and skittles fell out


ok so...3 guys are on a mountain and a fairy comes and say...run off the mountain say w/e you want w/e you say you wil land in..so the first guy runs runs and says gold..so he lands in a pile of gold..the other guy runs runs and say girls/..so lands in a pilke os ladies..the other guy runs runs and tripps and say shit and falls in a pile of shit..


ok so...i rider on a bus sees a hot laty on the bus...and when she gets off the he askes the bus driver how he can meat up with that girl...so the bus driver says...every friday she goes to the city church and prays...and if you go their with a black blanket on you and say you are god she will have sex with you...so friday coimes and he goes to the church and say he is god...then the latey say ok..lets have sex but we have to do it anely cuz i dont want lose my virginty...so they have sex and when they are does the guy takes of the blanket and says.."im the guy on the bus" then the latey takes of her mask and says "im the bus driver"
 
G

guslarsen

Bronze member
The 10th joke is kinda like the hell lame one thats like the boy goes down the slide and says "wee!" and then falls in the wee... nice yo mama jokes though.
 
S

sherjey

Member
Gus Larsen said:
The 10th joke is kinda like the hell lame one thats like the boy goes down the slide and says "wee!" and then falls in the wee... nice yo mama jokes though.
Click to expand...
thanks
 
G

guslarsen

Bronze member
HOW TO SPEAK CHINESE IN 2 MINUTES:

i hit my knee on the coffe table:
hai bang mai nee

he is cleaning his car:
wa shin ka

that's not right:
sum ting wong

i think you need a face lift:
chin tu fat

i thought you were on a diet:
wai yu mun ching

did you go to the beach:
wai yu so tan

stupid man:
dum gai

our meeting is sheduled for next week:
wai yu cum nao

see me ASAP:
cum hia nao

small horse:
tai ni po ni

i bumped into a coffe table:
ai bang mai ni

this is a tow away zone:
no pah king

its very dark in here:
wai so dim

stay out of sight:
lei ying lo

your body odour is offensive:
yu stin ki pu
 
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