Anti-Jokes

TommyChristiana

Bronze member
what did the little girl say when she fell...ow
Knock Knock, Who's there?, Orange...thats a weird name
what happened when a magic dragon got lost....it couldnt be found
what did the rock do when a dog pissed on it....nothing,its not alive
 

Scott Trainer

Super Moderator
Staff member
Thought Id bump this cause I heard a couple good ones.

You know what makes me smile?
Face muscles.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Extinct.
 

Scott Trainer

Super Moderator
Staff member
Yeah, my friend just goes through that shit for hours and spams the hell out of me with whatever he finds amusing haha.
 

ConnorD

Steel Member
What's 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night?



Crib Death.


Oh god I'm going to hell for laughing.
 

Bennett_J

Steel Member
What do you call I guy with no limbs? Whatever his name is, he has enough problems without being subject to abuse.



What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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BrandonD

Bronze member
Whats green and has wheels?
Grass, I lied about the wheels.

How do you confuse a blond?
Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
 

Victor C.

Member
Man walks into a bar and pauses: at the other end of the bar, there's this guy with a big orange head. Just kind of sitting there, mooning into his drink. So the man asks the bartender, "Say, what's up with the guy with the big orange head?" And the bartender says, "It's an interesting story. Buy him a drink and maybe he'll tell it to you."

So the man walks over and introduces himself and offers to buy a round. The guy with the big orange head says, "Yeah, I'll bet you want to know the story, huh?" To which the man replies, "Sure, if you don't mind."

The man with the big orange head sighs and says, "You know, I've gone over it in my mind a million times. Basically, it's like this: I was walking along the beach one day, when I stubbed my toe on something. I looked down, and there was an antique brass lamp. I picked it up and dusted it off a little -- when all of a sudden this enormous genie pops out!

"The genie thundered, 'You have released me from my ten-thousand year imprisonment, and I am in your debt. I will grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude.'

The man at the bar is agape. The guy with the big orange head continues: "So I said, 'Wow, okay. Well, my first wish is to be fantastically wealthy.'

"The genie says, 'Your wish is granted.' And all of a sudden I have rings on my fingers and a crown on my head, and my wallet is full of money and a dozen ATM cards and the deed to a mansion in the hills -- I mean, I was loaded!

"So I said, 'Amazing! Okay, for my next wish , I want to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world.'

"The genie says, 'Your wish is granted.' And the ocean parts, and out walks this gorgeous woman in this beautiful dress, and she takes my hand and we fall in love and the genie marries us right there. It was incredible.

"The genie booms, 'You have one wish remaining.'"

The man with the big orange head pauses and sips his beer. He says, "Now, you know, this may be where I went wrong. I wished for a big orange head.
 

Roycee

Member
Why the the boy fall off his bike? Because I threw a refrigerator at him.

What did the fish say to the other fish? I dont know I dont speak fish
 
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