Awkward hookup stories?

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Spicy McHaggis

Steel Member
I was having sex with my ex gf one day then right before i was about to finish i called my buddy and first thing i said to him was "Hey Travis, Boom! Headshot." As i came on her face.

I was hooking up with this chick once and she said to me, "Want me to jack you off?" I replied with a "No, because you're just gonna complain that your arm is gonna hurt after a while, your just gonna make me want head even more, odds are your just gonna talk the whole time and distract me, and plus no one can jack myself off better than myself." She then said, "Wow your rude." I said, "I know i'm going to go fuckk your friend." I then went and fucked her friend
 
Tylerr.

Tylerr.

Super Moderator
Staff member
Spicy McHaggis said:
I was having sex with my ex gf one day then right before i was about to finish i called my buddy and first thing i said to him was "Hey Travis, Boom! Headshot." As i came on her face.

I was hooking up with this chick once and she said to me, "Want me to jack you off?" I replied with a "No, because you're just gonna complain that your arm is gonna hurt after a while, your just gonna make me want head even more, odds are your just gonna talk the whole time and distract me, and plus no one can jack myself off better than myself." She then said, "Wow your rude." I said, "I know i'm going to go fuckk your friend." I then went and fucked her friend
Click to expand...
idk what to believe and what not to... but shit
hahaha
 
JustinLeach

JustinLeach

Bronze member
Over spring break, I stayed at one of my buddy's houses, and he had 2 of his "friends" over... Him and one of the girls were laying on his bed just going at it, so me and the other chick decided to go in his closet, bare in mind that he has a huge walk in closet with a matress on the floor. We started to make out.. and she decides to go south, unzipping my pants and started to give me a handy jay. after a few minutes, she decided to go even farther and started giving me head. Sounds good right? WRONG! Before they showed up, they got a lotta bit drunk, and this girl thinks she can go farther than she did.. I guess she choked a little and threw up. on and all around my dick. I freaked out, and ran out of the closet, through my friends room, and straight to the bathroom. I did not have any pants on and I was also hard when this happened.. So I ran in front of my friend and his girl with puke on my hard on.. After I cleaned up, I realized I forgot my pants, and he just so happens to keep all his towells in a closet in his hallway, so I had to walk pretty much naked through his house, get a towel, and go back into his room... When we all 3 looked in the closet, The girl was passed out in her own vomit... So yeahh, I guess it's a good thing she doesn't remember that night?
 
D

D ∆ V I D

Basic Bunch
two year bump damn. just read the whole thread and all this period stuff is just gross. probably my awkward hookup was summer '11 and i was in a public green with my friends hoe's friend while my he was at the other end with his significant other. we were pretty much looking at each other until i was just like, "hmm hmm"(looked down at my zipper). she continued and when it actually went down she was scraping her teeth the WHOLE time. worst experience I've ever had. another one was recently when i went over my friends house and he had two girls over from another town. he had already known them and i have never met them before. so he basically just looked at me to go into the bathroom and i got a bumpkin. that on the other hand, was quite awesome
 
Joe Riley

Joe Riley

The Gypsy
Staff member
I partied with Ryan Upchurch down in Delaware and this girl who had an abortion the day before gave me a handy.

Had sex with some girl in her basement while her mom was eating in the kitchen right above us, and she heard everything.

Almost banged the same chick as one of my boys one night (I didn't know) but he saved me right before it went down haha.

edit- moving this into grown-up discussion!
 
K

Keenan Still

Steel Member
one of my good ass friends decided to call a bunch of he friends over and put a tent in her backyard and just chill and drink and smoke. Started to chilling with this one girl, we happend to be in the corner, just chillin, i sparked a blunt and shared it with her, and half way threw the l she just like hopped on me and started vigerously making out with me. It was kind of weird the way it went down. I gave the rest of the l to my boy and then started to get comfortable, charm her a little. Well then the bitch just put her hands in my pants, cuffed my balls and dick, and just ripped them out of my pants. It was clear she wanted it. The girls house was actually a town house and it had these really cool alley things, and there was this power box. so i went and sat on the power box, got some dome, did ma thang. And then she was saying how she wanted to fuck. I had no condom and i was about to raw dog this random chick, and on top of that she wasnt down for fucking on the power box. So i pretty much just walked away and went back to the tent. On my way back i turn around, and she just walked up to one of my homies and made out with him, about a minute or two after i nutted in her mouth. He was so sap when he found out, i felt horrible. But he ended up fucking her that night and im so glad i didnt because her mom found out and made this huge ass deal.
 
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